OK, I was half right. Lance Berkman and Hunter Pence did do some damage early — Berkman was 3 for 5, with an RBI in the top of the first, and Pence homered in the second — but ultimately having Shawn Chacon pitch for you is just too much of a handicap to overcome. The Astros have now lost eight in a row and ten of eleven. Do yourself a favor and drop any Houston players you might have who are masquerading as pitchers.

Today has started out on a relatively high note, as Kerry Wood picked up a win for me by pitching the top of the ninth in a 3-3 game, which Aramis Ramirez promptly ended in the bottom half with a shot to deep center. My closers haven’t been getting much work lately, so it was good to see one of them finally put up some numbers. A few of tonight’s matchups promise to be both interesting and productive for yours truly:

John Maine vs. Colorado Rockies: Maine’s a bit of an enigma. Opponents are only batting .238 against him, yet he’s only won one of his last six starts. There’s nothing too wacky in his peripherals that suggests it’s anything more than lack of support — his ERA’s still solid, WHIP has come up a little bit, still a very good strikeout guy with a K/BB over 2:1. I always hate sending my pitchers to Coors Field, but Maine’s upside is so good that his owners kind of have to take that chance. At least the Rockies kind of suck this year.
Russell Martin/James Loney vs. Cliff Lee: Lee’s numbers are obviously way beyond his actual level of talent. That’s not to say that he can’t pitch, because he can, as evidenced by his excellent peripherals. He’s kept the ball in the park (5 bombs in 88+ innings), struck out quite a few guys (7.7 punchouts per nine — much better than Michael Barrett) and kept his walks way down (16). The Dodgers really, really need Rafael Furcal. Their shortstop situation is pathetic. Dear Angel Berroa: If you can’t do better than .194/.286/.226, do yourself a favor and just let the batboy hit for you. Stop embarrassing yourself by going to the plate and acting like you’ll do something useful. You’re not fooling us. Sincerely, THE ESTABLISHMENT. No, but seriously, Martin and Loney are a great 4-5 combination, and it will be fun to watch them battle with the red-hot Lee tonight.
Evan Longoria vs. Roy Oswalt: Royboy’s not himself. I don’t know if it’s a mental thing or what. Maybe his bulldozer’s broken down. Or he had a bad hunting trip and he’s depressed and it’s affecting his pitching or something. Whatever the problem is, he’s coming off one of his worst games in a long time, and Longoria has a chance to capitalize on that. A young, fearless hitter on a semi-hot streak can make even seasoned hurlers look foolish under the right circumstances (e.g. Oswalt serving up lifeless belt-high fastballs like he did against the Yankees). Look for the Rays to punish the downward-spiraling Astros.
Jacoby Ellsbury vs. Kyle Lohse: Lohse was having trouble finding a job not long ago, and now he sports a shiny 8-2 record and a 3.77 ERA for the Redbirds. He’s really more of a 4.50-level pitcher — you can thank the Cards’ defense for some of the discrepancy, and luck for most of the rest of it. Philly’s pitching shut Ellsbury down for the most part, but he’s too talented to remain in a funk for long. Expect Lohse’s ERA to normalize a bit tonight, with Ellsbury playing a significant role.